Mermaid Pirate Dispatch

Super Nova drifted down to the dusty tiles of the demolished bank, her silky cape billowing in the air around her. Her sleek blond hair rippled violently before coming to a soft rest on her shoulders as her feet flatted on the ground. She surveyed the scene, looking for one survivor in particular.

The roof of the building was almost entirely gone letting the sunlight illuminate the interior, which was littered with piles of brick, drywall, and cement. A dwindling fire flickered in one corner, and in another corner she found who she was looking for: Bob.

He and a few other survivors were huddled behind the teller counter. Even from a few dozen feet away she could smell the telltale stench of fear: urine, body odor, and bad gas. She ran to the counter and hurled it effortlessly, spinning around to face the cowering employees.

“Bob?” she asked, gazing down at them heroically. “Are you the one who stood up to my nemesis, The Black Hole?”

The scrawny teller stared up at her from the floor with wide eyes, his face caked in dusty tears. A thin trickle of blood carved a path down his temple through the debris that clung to every bit of his exposed skin and hair. His tie was torn and half his dress shirt was covered in sweat and bloody rips. Slowly he got to his feet, barely nodding his head in bewildered reply to her question.

“Come with me,” she said, stretching her hand out to take his.

He reached out and she pulled him to his feet, throwing her arm around his shoulders. She heard the ladies he’d been hiding with whispering as she escorted Bob around the broken counter into the rest of the mangled bank.

In her head, Super Nova heard the voice of The Black Hole speaking to her telepathically.

Tell him he looked breathtakingly dashing when he bravely lunged at me, her friend’s voice said.

Super Nova smiled to herself and replied in her head, who are we setting him up with? You or the cute teller he’s got his eye on?

Just tell him that he looked dashing, not that I thought he looked dashing!

Super Nova squeezed Bob heartily against her side. “Boy I tell you what,” she said. “It’s not often I see such a dashing display of heroism in everyday people like yourself.” She smiled down at him.

His eyes shot briefly up to meet her gaze, then his countenance fell with the ease of a lifetime of practice.

She stopped walking and took him by the chin, lifting his face to meet hers. “Bob, you’re a great guy, and I’m serious. Nobody stands up to The Black Hole like that. I mean it, that was incredibly brave of you. I bet a certain coworker of yours saw that and right now she’s thinking, ‘man that Bob guy is super cool!’ And you are! You’re cool!”

Bob laughed nervously and looked away. “Nah,” he said. “I was just doing what anyone would do. Plus, I was scared out of my mind. I think I wet myself.” He shifted his weight around and crossed his knees in shame.

Super Nova was sure he had wet himself. “Come on,” she urged. “So what? Everybody gets scared sometimes, even me. But you stood up and protected your coworkers, and my super keep powers of observation are telling me that a certain someone absolutely loved seeing that confidence in you.”

Bob blushed and pulled away, snapping his chin back to his chest. “Nah,” he sighed. “She never notices me.”

“Hey,” Nova said, pushing him playfully on the shoulder. “Stop that. I just saw an incredibly confident Bob stand up to the most powerful super villain this town has ever seen. You have to start seeing that confident, heroic side of yourself too. You know the last guy who tried to stand up to The Black Hole…” Super Nova tisked and shook her head in shame. “He crapped his pants and ended up paying for it dearly.”

Nova, we took that guy out for drinks, didn’t we?

Hush! Nova shot back telepathically.

Bob looked up at her meekly. “Really?”

“Heck yeah,” she said. “What you did today was really impressive. You should feel amazing. You’re a hero.”

Bob thought a moment. “You think so? Me?”

Super Nova grinned at him and glanced back to the lady tellers who had gotten to their feet behind the counter. “Yeah, I know it. Now go ask that cute teller out to dinner. I have a feeling she doesn’t have any other plans and she’d love to spend some time with you, her hero.”

Bob looked over his shoulder at the girls, then back to Nova. “Well…” he began, full of doubt.

“Just do it! Trust me!”

He cocked half a smile, took a deep breath, and jogged over to the counter.

Another job well done, her friend sighed dreamily into her mind.

Yeah, Nova thought, beaming.

[Reddit Post]